Rejection, and Why it's Good for the Soul

When I stand back a look at my life as a bystander observing, sometimes I have to just smile and laugh. Not because it's necessarily funny.  But because of how everything in my life lines up just.  so.  sometimes.

Like, with eerie precision.

Of course, I know this is not because of my doing, but because of God's perfect timing.

I'm just gonna put it out there blatantly:  I got rejected.  I've had a few people ask lately about my doctoral application to a particular program, and I didn't have an answer until about 4pm today.  And it wasn't the one I had been hoping for.

But it was the one I had been praying for.

Let's not confuse that last statement - I didn't pray that I would get turned down from a doctoral program that I honestly felt was a terrific match to my academic interests and professional passions.  But I also hadn't been praying to necessarily get in.  I had been praying for God's will through it all.

Am I disappointed? Absolutely.  From one perspective, it was bound to happen.  See, over my academic career, I've applied to 4 undergraduate programs and 3 graduate (masters level) programs - and never once have I gotten a rejected.  Not even wait listed.  And I'm fortunate and privileged for that.

But I'm also fortunate and privileged for answered prayer.

Am I upset?  Sad?  Mad?  No.  I'm actually content with this.  At complete peace.  I can't be sad or mad about this - my God listened to my prayers (and the prayers of others), and he answered.  He delivered.

And trust me, I'm not posting this entry to garner sympathy from others.  Please, don't apologize in sympathy or empathy for me.  Don't tell me you're sorry.  Because I'm not.  I'm not sorry at all - there's nothing to be sorry for!  I asked my brothers and sisters in Christ to pray with purpose, they did, and this is the answer - that's something to be thankful for!

Does rejection sting?  Definitely.  Is in uncomfortable?  Oh yes.

But it's what we do in these moments that have the ultimate impact in our lives long term.  Do you shut down?  Take one rejection as a sign telling you that your passions, desires, and dreams are ridiculous and unobtainable?

Or do you consider the other potential reasons - maybe this is the right time?  The right place?  The right (whatever) - the potential of other reasons is endless, honestly!

My life verse since I was a teenager has been Jeremiah 29:11.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” 

To me, my God has never been one of limiting people's potential or "boxing people in".  God doesn't tell us, "the life you're living right now is just how it's going to be."  I read Jeremiah 29:11, and I see a God who wants me (and us!) to grow - to flourish.   Become better.  Smarter.  Stronger.  Healthier.  The list goes on and on...

I'm choosing to see this rejection as something positive.  An area of growth and learning.  A chance to persevere and try again - maybe not with the same strategy or game plan, but try again nonetheless.  A chance for me to sit back and truly acknowledge that God hears me and he answers my prayers.  I think we can learn a lot about God and his faithfulness in the moments when he answers prayer in ways adverse to our worldly desires.

God knows what he's doing.  He always has.  He always will.

And I'm honestly more excited to ever to find out what that is...